Most of us are competitive at things that we do—we want to win. It is more fun to win there is a feeling of accomplishment that winning provides and it means we performed better than our opponent and that includes an inherent feeling of well being. We must always remember that for every winner there is at least one loser—someone is on the short end of the stick each and every time. I immediately think of Jerry West—the great L.A. Laker star who could never win an NBA Title losing year after year to the Celtics in the Finals and it took an emotional toll on him. He was even voted the MVP of the Finals one year and his team lost—his performances were Hall of Fame worthy but it was not enough to give him solace or comfort—only winning could do. He finally did win the title in his 13th NBA season and the relief was enormous.
He was competitive and hated to lose but always gave praise to the Celtics and admitted they were indeed the better team. I cannot say the same for many golfers who I have played with over the years. Some take it to the point of destroying relationships because they lose and say it is competitive but in reality they just can’t admit the other guy is better at golf. There is a distinct difference between being competitive and a sore loser. Arnie and Jack were totally competitive and wanted to beat each other’s brains out every time on the course but after it was over they would go have a beer together and needle each other into the night.
For some reason so called competitive amateur mid-handicap golfers sometimes do not understand the distinctive differences between the two—competitiveness and being a sore loser and frankly not even wanting to admit the other guy really is better at golf than you are. In the end it is childlike behavior and the “sore loser” is missing the bigger picture—this is a great time for him to try to get better at golf instead of trying to give a flimsy excuse why he lost today. If you are one of these golfers change right now as your friendship may depend on it.